I migrated to the UK in 1963, got married and we settled in Leeds. We did what was available in the beginning to fulfil our essential needs. I worked in a sewing factory and my husband in an engineering firm. At that time Indian migrants could only bring £3 with them making it obvious that we had to start from scratch. Once we stood on our feet, we set up a fabric business in 1974 and we really worked hard to build it up. Our hard work paid off and we prospered in our business and bought some properties. Resham always treated me as an equal partner and wanted that I should not only enjoy my life but also move forward by learning other skills, for example driving the car. This loving and happy time slipped away, then I got a shock the day Resham was diagnosed with cancer.

It was Covid time and Resham became ill. Our GP referred him to the hospital. I drove him to the hospital but was not allowed to stay there. After two hours, I got a phone call from the hospital asking me to come to the hospital and see them. I became worried and was very upset. When I went there, I was told to sit down. That made me a bit better thinking that it might not be serious. After sometime the doctor came and disclosed that Resham had cancer. At that time I behaved normally even though it was shocking news. We drove home and he told me not to tell the children, but I could not help but disclose the news to the children. He never talked about anything except business and the transfer of all our possessions into my name. We looked after him day and night and our nearest hospice gave us compassionate and clinical support. They provided a Punjabi speaking community volunteer who offered spiritual care, who not only talked to my husband but also cared for me in my lonely and stressful time.

The community nurses were excellent and then the day came when he quietly slipped away from our lives in January 2021. I was shocked and my children really gave me good care. It was difficult for me to open up to them in terms of my emotional feelings. My children would often take me out for a change of scene. They drove me where I wanted to go and they also accompanied me for the holidays. It is two years since I lost my husband, and I am shedding tears while writing this story. He was a pleasant and jolly person. I do certain things that he used to do such as incense burning in the morning. I may one day overcome my grief but could never forget him and the time I spent with him.