Hello, I’m Steve Golding. Blind lad. I want to tell you a story of how I used to walk up a bus and find a seat. I used to feel the seats left and right. I found some glorious chests! Now I walk with the backs of my hands forward.

“There’s a seat to your left.”

“Oh! you mean my other left!”

Once I got on the bus, minding my own business, and some lads tried to get on without a ticket and they weren’t allowed. After a commotion, off they went, ran across the road and BAM! I heard the window smash and suddenly something hit me. Talk about seeing stars, I saw the galaxy! The article bounced off me – and onto a pram with a baby inside. They told me later, that the thing that hit me was a claw hammer.

A humorous incident… I’d been drinking and had fallen asleep on the bus. Then I heard these voices saying goodnight to each other. There weren’t any lights on and it sounded like it was raining heavily.

I moved forward and said “Where are we?”

The driver replied “Where did you come from?”

I replied “The seat behind the steps”.

“In is in the bus wash! Stop where you are and I’ll drop you off back home.”

“At home”? I asked hopefully.

“No. Outside the wash so you can walk home”.

Which he did and it was chucking it down.